Pendleton Original Canadian Whisky

It reminds me of candy corn creme brulee that had a caramel macchiato spilled on it. And before any purists jump on me about authentic macchiatos, I know. This doesn't resemble THAT kind of macchiato. It's like the overly sweet, fluffy, trashy version. That's what this tastes like: overly sweet, fluffy trash. The experience is similar to a night with a woman of similar qualities. Initially, you're delighted as the light, sugary woman enters, thinking, "This will be fun!" But soon, her true nature emerges: disappointingly hollow and uninteresting. You sadly wish she'd leave, as someone else might appreciate her, but not you. You'd quickly become bored and resentful. So, if you enjoy Pendletons, I'm genuinely happy for you. You keep that woman, indulge yourself, and don't let go, damn it. If you do, someone else will snatch her up, and she'll forget you instantly. But that someone won't be me. I don't like that woman, and I don't like Pendleton.

Faint hints of butterscotch, marmalade, maple, and vanilla, along with noticeable alcohol fumes, on the nose. The mouthfeel is quite light. The palate is also rather muted, showing more alcohol, butterscotch, vanilla, and maple. The finish is brief to moderate, and while it's smooth in that there's hardly any alcoholic sting – this chemical alcohol flavor like hand sanitizer persists strongly throughout the whole drinking session, mostly ruining it. It's reminiscent of a certain rum, which isn't a compliment. 2.00/5.00 – Poor (neat)

Sampling from a small bottle. Aroma of maple syrup and a faint chemical scent (I can see the description of Elmer's Glue). Sweet vanilla syrup, with a thin mouthfeel. A touch of oak and grassy spice, with more corn syrup in the finish. It genuinely possesses a somewhat artificial maple taste.

A Canadian whiskey, with no age specified, minimum 3 years old. Imported and bottled in Oregon. 40% alcohol by volume. Aroma: somewhat sharp, with an unusual sweetness and oak. Taste: some sweetness, mild oak, and a few peculiar notes. In my view, it's average at best. Price: over $20 plus tax. Grade: C

The professional assessment of this spirit, specifically the mention of smelling like glue, is fascinating. As someone who appreciates that scent, I was very curious! Honestly though, it's not as bad as actually drinking glue, and I've experienced worse!

One of the most underwhelming spirits I've encountered. I finally purchased a 375ml after seeing it around for a while. The aroma and taste are consistent; it's essentially a mix of vodka, rum, artificial vanilla, and artificial caramel flavoring. Avoid it.