Troyanska 4-year Slivovitz

I believe this is the worst alcohol I have ever purchased. This makes it difficult to rate because I am relatively new to the world of spirits, so I'm uncertain how much worse things exist. I'm giving it a 1.25 because, well, I'm still alive, and it doesn't make me vomit instantly, and if I'm being generous, I can even identify a few promising notes, similar to how after being hit in the head with a baseball bat, you might find some small comfort in seeing pretty stars and colors. But drinking this is not a pleasant experience. I'm sitting here with a small pour to write this review solely as an act of noble self-sacrifice. For a moment, there's something somewhat nice about the smell. It's a clean, fruity scent, plums perhaps, though it reminds me more of blueberries. Unfortunately, "clean" quickly becomes "cleaning solvent," and it's all downhill from there. There is an unpleasant chemical odor that dominates the aroma. It's been a while since I've smelled formaldehyde, but yes, maybe it's formaldehyde. Or perhaps old newspapers soaked in rubbing alcohol? Whatever it is, it's not good. The taste, sadly, is even worse. I've never tasted formaldehyde, but let's just say the main component of the taste is consistent with the smell. It kind of makes my tongue pucker, if that's possible. Any remaining plum or blueberry flavor is hard to detect. There is a woody characteristic, but it's harsh and unpleasant, like chewing on a twig. The best I can say for it is that at first, it hardly tastes like anything, before the formaldehyde kicks in. The finish brings back vague childhood memories of having to force down some cough syrup or other medicine. With a last gasp, it goes down your throat, and you sort of stick your tongue out and move your lips around to try to get rid of the aftertaste --- but at least you're finally free of it! The extent of my sacrifice in enduring this for this review is only now becoming apparent to me. I had wanted to enjoy a nice glass of something tasty tonight, but now I will likely have to rinse my mouth out and wait half an hour before I can enjoy anything else. Okay, I'm having fun writing this review. This slivovitz is probably not as bad as I'm making it sound. It's not like I'm retching and gagging. But it is not good, at least not to my palate. (I would say I'm just not a slivovitz person, but I did have some in Croatia that I recall being quite tasty, so it can't just be that.) The only reason I haven't poured it out is because I can't bring myself to admit my mistake in buying this bottle. Not recommended.